Alot of things have happened recently and i feel i must explain myself.
i dont care who's side are you on and whether u thinki am speaking accurately...If u dont like wat i'm saying,i wont stop you but pls dun read on if u're not very happy.

this blog is my only refuge now and i'm saying exactly wat i tink
1) Firstly,i have to make it clear,if u're not close to me,kindly do not take the liberty to mess with me.i mean as in usually i'm okay with it but not when i'm really down or tired.its like another stress to me.i cant smile coz it cracks my face.

things started when person A swiped some eyeshadow on my face out of the blue for no reason when i'm busy finding my own stuff.Person B started laughing and congratulated him.while i stand there in irritation.the first thought tat came to my mind was "why cant any of u leave me alone even when i'm not talking or making any noise?? why must i get this from A when i haven't even talked to him??" The laughing of B pissed me off.because:
B thinks its incredibly funny coz he isn't the one feeling tired and being used as a joke.

Is there a need to laugh like this and congrat A?have you ever considered my feelings? no,coz u were busy enjoying it when it was'nt you.

then,i did the same to B coz " if u can think its such a great joke when it happened to me.why dont YOU TRY IT??"

honestly,what kind of friend are u?u can laugh but is there a need for such loud and long laughter?u're seriously getting on my nerves.

Admittedly,i was too much when i put it on his white shirt with blue eyeshadow.But weren't u jus saying in e aft noon,u can wait to get rid of e shirt?

B got pissed and kicked my on my large bruise on my hip.DO U HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH IT HURT?doesn't mean i keep my silence means it doesn't hurt.

Yes you're angry over this,den what makes u tink i wasn't angry over e incident earlier?Are you trying to say its okay for u to getr angry but i cant? coz i'm like a joke machine for u guys rite?

Even if i was very angry,i would NEVER hit someone.i would only scold vulgarities.yes i noe what everyone's thinking.u always slap us for fun.But then think properly,tat was when i wasn't angry.Have any of u saw me hit someone first when i'm angry?
Have u ever thought wat went thru my mind?"u are a guy and how can u hit a gal?"
no matter how tomboyish i was,i am still a girl.You said i was ill bred.Den based on this,wat was B?

after the hit,i didn't spew any vulgarities even tho it was really painful.i said " why dont u let me hit u once and then we're fair?" but you started scolding vulgarities at me.Tell me again,i tot u were very well bred?
First B(you) hit me and then B scolded me with vulgarities.I cant help but think its very ungentlemanly...you said "chi bye, your parents raised you up so many years to have no brains?"

den let me ask you.u're older than me two years and u haven't noticed tat guys should not hit gals?Juinnkai said why did i smear it on yoiu knowing this might happen....
i can only say this truthfully;
" i figured out B will be angry and react but while i was expecting e vulgarities and all,i REALLY wasn't expecting e physical action.After all,he's more mature! "

i was so wrong.one fact: Dont call me ill bred coz ur actions weren't very savoury.YES i admit i was wrong to start,but wat about you?did you really think anyone loves being laughed at like this and keep quiet? i haven't even done anything to u all and i even kept quiet coz i wanted to fade away and left away.

when i was noisy,u all complained.When i'm quiet cant u all leave me alone?

But irregardless i take responsibility for the fact that i shouldn't have smeared on your shirt.I did my best holding back my irritattion and anger but i guess when it came to the vulgarities i couldn't hold back alrdy.

The rest thinks i keep bringing this up and giving everyone a hard time.Do all of u all seriously think i like this?I brought it up again coz B rash actions aggravated my injury.pp can tell me to forgive and forget,i would have if there was no pain involved.After all without the physical aggravation,only words tat hurt and these can be forgotten.

But now B have aggravated my injury.Let me ask, have it been you,would u forgive?and forget?

someone commented can it be that my frens jus wan to get over with the argument coz they dont like being caught in the middle.True i agree no one likes tis.
But if u are this sort of frens,what does it say?you dont care about wat those involved think?
B can put it out of his mind coz he's not injured.more over he doesn't feel a tiny bit guilty.i cant do anything about it,it just speaks volume about anyone's character ,thinking and bringing up.I wont comment on bringing up coz i'm not the parents,i have no right.Jus as i respect you,respect me.Even if i keep quiet,it doesn't mean i've forgotten or forgiven.It just means i've decided to give in because i've realised tat you aren't fully aware or matured enough.

I feel so much anger but things like this have a funny way of coming back,on the contrary, i'll soon realise that i've become a better person because i chose to give way in such a unforgivable issue.Whereas for you....hah.

i read somewhere something that really made sense.

AS YOU GROW UP,YOU DONT LOSE FRIENDS ,YOU JUST REALISE WHO ARE YOUR REAL FRIENDS.

Now i figured out.